Anger

There is such a rage building in the depths of the body of my wrath. This feeling is driving my pulse to the limits of containment. Will I be able to control this anger and put this drive to proper use, or will my desire to propel it become more of a reality than desired? My mind fuels this fire by pulling forgotten memories back to the rising surface. I replay these moments of torment as if they were events of the recent past… recalling each breath and word. The mind is spectacular in its unlimited imagination.

Love is uncontrollable and on one extreme of the pole of emotions… a strong and unyielding emotion which has driven the strongest of men into places of uncertain contentment. Hatred and anger are regarded to be opposites of this drive of love, but the two pour similar conditions upon our unclothed minds. Are we able to contain our passions for hostility or for love? My mind races with questions of similarities and differences.

This feeling of anger is not to be held as wrong. The postures of the patterns in my mind are real and just… and if understood and controlled, can be a healthy addition to my emotional portfolio.

My neck and face become incarcerated with heat and my patience pulled to the limit… as if stretched at both ends. My ability to produce logical thoughts falls all around me like the sweat from my pours. My pulse intensifies and my eyes see only what my mind drives them to see.

I become a maker of plans. Schemes of revenge surge from my mind and fulfill the desires of my consciousness. Time is the only companion toward peace. If these convulsed illusions can be laid to rest for a period of time, my anger will calm.

I fight within myself. Shall I hold this fury and lash out to my target, or will I choose to ask the Maker to calm my soul? I must rely on His strength and experience. The choice is mine… I have been given this freedom from the beginning.

To be the person I visualize myself to be, I know the destiny of my decision. I know, at times with contentment, what is to be the right concession. However, my flesh grins at the possible alternatives.

Let this rage flow into calmness and expose a new growth of fulfillment. Let the smoke from this personal battlefield lift and reveal a calm that will help inspire others to the proper path.

Shannon R Killman